So, you are ready to go live on your Facebook page.
You are still feeling a bit nervous and insecure, although you really need this to work for your business.
Others seem to be doing it fine, so why can´t you?
You sit there, open the app, press that button and suddenly you feel the weight of the heaviest rock you can imagine.
Will anybody turn up?
Will they ask questions?
Will I know how to answer them professionally?
Oh, dear, my whole reputation is at stake, if I mess this video up, I am done, it will mean the end of my dream of becoming my own successful, self sufficient business owner I have envisioned.
Oh, gosh, no, I can´t possibly go live!
I am not ready!
I will cancel, anyway, nobody expects me to go live, I have no audience!
Oh no, but the longer it takes me to do videos, the longer I will have to wait to get my message out there.
And the longer it will be to get clients!
Oh but, if I don´t get clients, I will have to abandon my dream of being an entrepreneur! And I will have to go back to my boring job!
Oh, I couldn´t take that again. Especially when I left and I told everyone I was going to make it big.
What if some of my ex colleagues are watching?
Oh, no, I couldn´t handle that. Not today. it´s not a good time, My hair a mess…oh, but …
What if I do go live and show them that I am bloody good at my craft
Oh but, if I make it big, I will get haters, and I don´t want that. I want them to love me.
But…if I don´t ever go live, they won´t be able to get to know me, so they won´t be able to love anyway.
Oh, dear, what shall I do?
Someone…please, help!
Can you relate to this?
I bet you can.
No matter how many times you have tried to put yourself out there, a little bit (or a lot) of fear comes crawling right back at you!
It´s so sleazy, sometimes you won´t even feel it coming, but boom! Press that go live button and you get all the symptoms…again and again.
So I have decided to help you overcome those fears, insecurities and self-doubts. Because I was you, I still am!
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The other day, during a #shareathon I spoke about my struggles when going live and with video, in general. But obviously, worst form of video for a shy person is Live! (You can watch that video below)
I remember when I kept telling myself, the more you do anything, the less scary it gets and the better you get at it, well surely it has to be the same with live streaming.
I knew if I wanted to take my business online, there was no way I could avoid embracing video.
You see…my business is related to Video, hello? Video Backdrops!
So here was I, helping other people do amazing videos, creating beautiful branded and supportive backdrops and I was too afraid of doing a video! Can you see the paradox?
Therefore, I was committed to overcome my fears. Which, I tell you have been (and still are) huge, ever since I remember. Just so you get an idea, I saw a camera and I ran away, that was always my reaction while growing up, and I tell you with a mum that enjoyed photography and video…that was hard, lol! Just imagine how scared I was that I don´t even have a video of my wedding…and I only agreed to having a photographer because it wouldn´t have been fair on my husband or guests…but I had a really hard time with that too (my photo album must be hidden away somewhere…).
So, I am not going to tell you it is easy. I am not going to tell you to do 10 videos and then you will be a pro, no, it is a process, it takes an effort and commitment, but you can totally do it. Believe me.
It takes time, it takes commitment, it takes some tips and tools that will make it a bit easier and then, one day, you will realise that although you did get nervous, it was actually exciting.
And you know then, that if only one day that excitement feels stronger than the panic, you will actually start enjoying it. Just think that if you are able to feel that, even if it is just once, there are chances you will be able to feel it more often, does it make sense?
There will be set backs, some days will suck, other days you will feel like you pushed through and did a decent job, other days you will even feel like you´ve got this.
My humble advice is, keep going, practice is necessary and you will never actually be doing it as bad as you think, honestly. Those silences that seem like minutes are imperceptible, that stumbling upon words…you will get over it and you can even joke about it to lessen the pressure. Note: I still haven´t been able to master that, but I will one day!
People can relate to nerves, they can relate to struggles, they won´t think you are less professional because of your shyness, believe me, if anything, you will be able to inspire more people to give it a try.
You will be able to inspire more people to try live streaming despite their shyness. Click To Tweet
Now, this is only a short list of things that I have found have helped me and are still helping me along the way:
- Community: find yourself a supportive group of people that are going through the same struggle or that are ahead of you, so they can lead and help out. I have found the #peri10k Mastermind to be such community. Both for the support and for the responsibility not to let the others in the community down, you pull through and do it as best you can. It took me 5 months to do my very first #shareathon , my only regret now is not jumping in before. I think it is the best way to overcome any fear, you just have to do it and that´s it. Sometimes “just do it” is the best therapy!
- Start a support pod or even a practice group where you can get constructive feedback and you can support and find support at the same time. Start small, in a supportive and constructive environment. A closed facebook group is a good platform as you can actually test your live streaming. You are very welcome to join my Facebook group and find the support you need.
- Find your turning point. When I realised it is not about me, but about my message and what I can do for others, a heavy weight got off my shoulders. I realised my message is much more important than me feeling awkward on camera.
- Don´t be afraid to share your struggles. I used to think everything had to be perfect and I could not share my panic, when you share, you never know who you might be inspiring and encouraging.
- Be engaged, this is sometimes the hardest, especially at the beginning. You are trying not to forget what you want to say and you completely forget to check the messages, to welcome people…it takes practice. I have done complete scopes without replying t any comments…trying not to do it any more. Setting yourself triggers and reminders helps. Here is when having a supportive office or space (wherever you do videos) is so crucial and helpful.
- Related to the point above: look straight into the screen, to the camera. Avoiding eye contact at all costs, I know, I have been there…doesn´t look good. It also takes practice, but once you do it, it´s there to stay. A trick for this is not to sit , or stand too far away from the camera. Sit or stand at a comfortable distance, where you have enough backdrop showing (it is there for a communication, branding and marketing purpose, more on that on another post) but a distance that allows you to read any incoming comments and that lets your viewers see your eyes. Eye contact (although not real) creates empathy, relatability and connection. And that is what you are looking for when you do a video.
- Use a Backdrop: a backdrop is a communication, branding and marketing tool, every video needs one (different types apply to each type of video) but for shy people, it is even more important as it has psychological effects on us.
It acts not only as a physical support, which it does, but as a psychological support too.
It is especially important for shy people to have a backup plan that they can rely on if words don´t come to us, if our mind goes blank…or if you get stuck on words…you need a very powerful backdrop to compensate for that. Note that you are actually not compensating for that but for your belief that that is happening, hope this makes sense.
Your backdrop should tell your story and show your expertise. It has the power of maximising your message, make you look professional, confident and trustworthy. Talk about a Super power! It can even save you from awkward moments if it is optimised (all backdrops should be, take the test), well styles and you set up triggers, reminders and conversation starters.
I hope these tips serve you well, please let me know if they do. Comment below or PM on Facebook. I love hearing from you.
If you feel you need help with your Backdrop, you might want to start with this. It is a first step towards a fully optimised backdrop, great if you are just starting out or if your budget is a bit tight.
If, however, you are ready for the full In-a-box backdrop design, go here.